Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Sitting on the middle age seat of life has been very humbling. Now some people might think that I am old. I am not! Well, maybe somedays I am old but I don't want to be. My Mother once told me she felt the same as she did at 65 as when she was 21. She then explained...Not physically but , she was still the same person. I was skeptical about that until I reached this time in my life. Guess what? I am the same person only different.

I have different ideals and dreams. Did I really want to be and English Teacher? I did, but I fell in love and married instead. As an adult, I remember that no one really liked their English teachers for all of the research, reading, writing that they had to do. I did like my English teachers though. I had two wonderful ones when I was in High School. One was very young and one was as very old. ( I thought) The younger one taught my children and I was glad that she shared her knowledge with them. They thought she was old. Isn't it funny how things turn around.

Why wasn't I brave enough to venture out a little further into the world? I have lived in three neighboring counties for all of my life. The Rancher has only moved 3 miles from where his parents brought him from the hospital so I guess I was a little more darring than he. In my growing up years, we didn't know there were so many choices. We lived in an area that had been tamed by our grandparents. They were the adventurists. They came in covered wagons from all parts of the Country and many never saw their families again. They started families of their own and made new friends. I thought it was hard to move into a new community and my parents were 45 miles away. How hard was that???? My worst adjustment was the fact that there were hardly any trees. Today I wouldn't change it. I love looking across the country at landmarks many miles away.

At one point in my youth, I thought I might be a missionary. Children always have dreams about different things. I knew that God wanted me to do something special and that was all I could think he wanted of me. My Mom told me that would be a very hard thing and I had to be really sure. (She had thought about beind a preacher herself) Here I post a note to my family who might think I am crazy. This is the truth. She practiced in the pasture and her mother could hear her all the way to the house as she preached God's word. Anyhow, I did grow up to teach children in their Sunday School classes and I know that is what God had planned for me to do.

I also dreamed of living in the mountains. I never even saw one until I was 21 years old. I had seen enough pictures to know how beautiful they were and I never once thought of the cold in the winter. I am thankful that I live where I do but I would like to spend more time in the mountains in the summer and fall months.
Life has many changes. Dreams we have for ourselves and the ones that we have for our families. It is good to dream but we have to be realistic too. I was not brave enough to go out very far into the world, and I am glad. I love it where I am and I am happy with me.

Did you have dreams that did not happen? Were they beyond your reach or did you just realize you were happy where you were?


Dawn said...

Wow! I knew about your dreams but I didn't know Grandma wanted to be a preacher!

Marilyn said...

I think that it was in a fantasy time right after a big revival in the community.